One of the things I rarely write about in my blogs is my weekly activities. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because I'm a mommyblogger, but I'm not a mommyblogger. Maybe because I"m a midlife blogger, but I'm not a midlife blogger. My life kind of blends into both. I'm a midlife mommyblogger? No, that doesn't quite fit, although I swear, if chemo pushed me into pre mental pause, some heads are going to roll. I don't plan on going mental pausal until I"m at least eighty. I do often step back and wonder why, knowing that my girls were about to enter high school, having about ten years left to the wonder years with them, being in my late forties and having the house to ourselves, did I start having babies again ( Seph is 18 (almost), Cay is 16 (almost) big big big break Abi is 4 (almost) Gus is 3 (for real) and Ave is 1 (almost).
What the heck?
Oh yeah, we thought the well had gone dry.
Well, it didn't. Boo on You.
Anyway, that leaves me stuck in the middle of some sorts of being the mom getting her daughters ready for college (soon), and being the mom getting her daughter, and soon the sons, ready for pre school. It's a weird place to be. There are times I feel like I don't quite belong in the new mommy pool (boy I forgot how vicious those guys can be) and times I feel like I don't belong in the high school mommy bleachers (band moms, sport moms, cheerleader moms...I just don't fit). We've missed many a football game, band event, and otherwise this year. Sometimes it just isn't feasible bringing a two year old and an infant to a football game. One wants to play kamikaze pilot off of the bleachers while the other wants to nurse and watch the game...at the same time. My husband and I were able to attend some of the events solo, but it was a bit lacking with the family theme. Needless to say, when you have three three and under at home, it also makes it hard to volunteer for booster events (not that I'm Ms. Volunteer of the Month to begin with). And let me tell you this, no one is more judgmental than booster parents when it comes to non booster participators. Erg. On the flip side, there really aren't many women my age birthin babies. And although the birth rate at my workplace has skyrocketed, I don't quite fit in new mommy circle either. I already know what they are trying to learn and when I offer my "Words Of Wisdom," I'm often looked at the know it all hippy dippy chic that doesn't want to drag a three year old to Disney World because I already know that a three year old will only like the first 30 minutes of it and then will whine for the rest of the five hours you're there. Not to mention that, hey, I am the middle aged dippy hippy chic and not the in my twenties young mom that the rest of them are. It's not their fault, really, that I don't quite fit in. I'm not sure I really want to fit in.
Before I go on, let me stop you now! I'm not really complaining. And no, you won't read about me selling my younger children to the black market gypsies, nor will you see me running away in the middle of the night with Vin Disel. There are just some times when I get tired of flying solo (especially since my husband goes to work at 5 a.m. and when he gets off of work he's working on rebuilding our house and doesn't get home til rather late...really late...extremely late...late).
And, in defense of all the booster moms and new mommies, I am a bit of a hermit. I find myself feeling more comfortable wearing mismatched clothing and hair pulled up in a pony tail reading or blah blahing, than I do running off to the nearest craft show or Disney World events. That's just me.
Bored today. I don't feel like it. You know what I mean?