At what point do you decide to make the one decision that will change your life forever? When do you decide that enough is enough and the most you want to make out of life is waking up, caring for your family, and live for YOUR day? When? What makes that final straw final?
I still get joy from teaching. I still can make them laugh. I can still laugh at them. I can still love them...forgive them...grieve with them...teach them.
For the most part.
There are those days...there are "those" days...and there are days like today. Today was tough. For one, I've spent the majority of the week thinking Monday was Wednesday and Thursday was Friday. Makes for a terribly loooonnnnngggg week. To make matters even better (heavy laced sarcasm), they think that teaching just isn't enough, they must also pile on so much paper work that even the trees growing in Brooklyn must be a shakin with enough fear to skin their bark. It's hard to imagine why test scores are flailing when it is more important for teachers to cross their t's and dot their i's instead of getting down to what matters.
Teaching.
Of course, when you are finally able to step in and teach, you have the Little Johnnys of the world sitting in their desks just daring you to be the adult in the class and challenge their snot nosed sarcastic attitudes with sugar and spice and you better treat me nice or I will cross my arms, pout, and refuse to do anything resembling class work until you have to threaten me with detention in which I will catch a fit, call you a liar, and pretend that my mom is going to beat me if you call her on the phone. Yes, that is a true story!
Enough!
When is enough?
Today was enough. . . But just for today. I will be back again tomorrow.
After all the tears, after all the jeers, crossing of arms, eyes that kill...Sixth period came along.
Thank whatever Gods may be for even the smallest of miracles.
Andy danced for us today. I swear I thought he was going to break something, but he just threw himself on the floor and started spinning around in his own semblance of a break dance. I'm teaching my sixth period class to call the principal "School Master." She gets a kick out of it. We get a kick out of calling her that. Small miracles, huh?
Gotta love em.
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Thankfully, a day of "enough" with respect to dealing with, coping with small children or even 17-year-olds who sometimes can cop a major attitude too, hasn't hit here. Not yet anyway. Close at times but thus far, no cigar.
ReplyDeleteNot in those aspects anyway.
But boy, after the way things went here today with other problems that landed on my daughter and son-in-law -and then will also reverberate to a degree to my life too, any dealings with the IRS is about enough to make just about anyone want to throw in the towel and scream "ENOUGH!"
As much as I think those who put up the "No Child Left Behind" stuff thought they were doing right, the intent I think may have been good, but the end result is far from ideal. Sometimes, I think some kind of parenting classes would serve the purpose of helping kids more than saddling teachers with tons of paper work, teaching to the tests and crapola like that on top of all the other issues teachers already have to deal with in the classroom. You have my utmost sympathy for having to cope with the bureaucratic side of the educational system. Tonight, anyone dealing with any part of the government and the bureacratic isses has my deepest sympathy!
Peace and I'm glad you going back for another go-round though tomorrow -er, today since it's officially "tomorrow" now.
I'm sure you've had plenty of days that rounded out as "enough" but more than likely a lot of them you just couldn't get enough--that's why you stay.
ReplyDeleteOh, Alex, you know you're speaking a language in which I am fluent, here.
ReplyDeleteThe emphasis is absolutely not on teaching - it's like an afterthought. Bless you for keeping things in perspective - or at least trying to.
And bless Andy. :-)
Hang in there, Sir (with love...)
I love Andy and your sixth period class.
ReplyDeleteSounds like they are the highlight of your day.
We should have regular sixth period posts every week.
Cuz we miss you.
Hang in there.
God bless Andy! And sixth period!
ReplyDeleteKeep on keeping on, Alex. You are wonderful. : )
To be honest with you, my first day of teaching other peoples children would have been the "enough" day. It's hard teaching my own boys sometimes, I can't imagine doing several other peoples kids. You are a brave woman and are greatly appreciated for sacrificing your time to do this. I'm glad Andy brightened your day by performing for the class.
ReplyDeleteyou sound like a fantastic teacher. I hope you don't give up.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you had a tough week. At least every day ends on high note with your 6th period class and the delightful Andy. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI used to teach. Honestly, I hated it. It was all politics and paperwork and at the end of the day I felt like I hadn't made a difference in anything or anyone.
ReplyDeleteMy sister teaches in a high school. I teach adults. She deals w/much more red tape crap. Now they put her as the chair of her department, and they make her go to millions of meetings- even a school-wide staff meeting. Outside of all your class time. she says- the more people at a meeting the less important it is for anybody. So she just goes to folks and talks to them or emails them what they need. And the other admin types are all- what, no meetings?
ReplyDeleteThey keep piling on new standards and goals, w/o caring which other things will therefore have to be pushed out... Making the books bigger and bigger. Like, in asia, where they ream us in math, the books are quite light. Less emphasis on amassing info- more on problem solving techniques...